10 May 2016
Ladies, if we went back to our journals as younglings and took a peek into our expectations of a partner at that time, we’d realize a lot of high horses and skyscrapers we took down. Growing up, we realize that maybe it isn’t so bad if we kicked a guy with “six packs” off the list because we never really cared about that anyways. Sometimes, we find that most of these laid down expectations were as a result of the influence of other people’s ideas of who a perfect partner is.
Even right now, we think there are somethings that are terrible to “settle with”, but they are really not, this goes to say that in the reality of relationships, sacrifices and compromises have to be made, but we need to get rid of the following as being a terrible thing to settle with:
- How much money he makes: I guess for most people we can agree that it is okay if he makes enough to make you and his family comfortable. He might not make a lot right now but the fact that he even makes enough lays a potential for better income later on. It’s better to be with someone who’s smart with their money than someone who just has endless amounts of it. Plus, sometimes the best dates are the ones that cost nothing at all. 😉
- How hot he is: If hot paid the bills, then maybe. Yunno, except he is a model or something. It’s okay that a guy doesn’t have the hottest look but can take care of you because after all is said and done, a hot body is a superficial, fleeting expectation that should be an added benefit and not top of the list.
- How tall he is: Like really, should we even be talking about this? You’re going to throw away the man of your dreams because you can’t wear your five inch heels around him. Okay the Kids? When we give this as a reason, I begin to think how much the society sees being short as some type of “disease”. Maybe if we didn’t have that sort of reaction towards it, being short will be as cool as being tall.
- Your differences: While a certain level of similarity is allowed, you won’t throw away the man of your dreams simply because he has other interests than you do. Even twins don’t. It isn’t reality to date a carbon copy of yourself. There is a possibility you might learn something new and different. How boring would it be dating yourself? Same routine and no spice.
- How awkward he is: I think for one, it is even a beautiful thing. It okay if your guy isn’t exactly the life of the party or doesn’t talk too much with friends. Embrace those little endearing quirks about him because he has be real enough to show you.
- How romantic he is: You want roses everyday, or a guitar performance singing your favourite song. That is nice, but in reality, romance is only an idea. A series of ideas we have been fed with growing up. We see couples going on dates in movies and think that is how it should be all the time. In reality, you will have to understand that this person might have a different idea of what romance means. Some people have weird ways of expressing how they feel, some physical, some mental, some, even, in silence. So a person taking a dump in your presence wasn’t so shy enough to do that because he has reached some level of intimacy with you. That in itself is romance, I tell you.
- How good he dresses: Yeah. Okay, maybe he doesn’t have to look like a bum, but maybe everyday he won’t dress like a Calvin Klein model. This among many others are some of the superficial things people find themselves worried about. Think of it as maybe you’re really in his life to help him out in that aspect.
Maybe you have that person you’ve been stalling for the silliest reasons? Go out there now and embrace it, you never know if you never try.
So there’s this funny quote that I’ll leave you with; “Some women spend their lives looking for superman, when Clark Kent has been around them the entire time.”