8 May 2016
Every relationship must deal with conflict, whether inter-personal or intra-personal relationship. Conflict is a proceed of every communication encounter. It is a result of differing or contrasting opinions rubbing against each other. In other words, conflict is a way of life. Thus, it is important to know how to properly deal with conflict.
In a relationship, the following are some unhealthy and harmful ways of dealing with conflict:
– Vocal trashing: This is akin to verbal abuse and can lead to harmful emotional and psychological effects. It is using your words to hurt your spouse or partner in a bid to win the conflict. This is very unhealthy because exchanging harsh words in a conflict only adds more fire to the argument and makes it harder for healing to take place as words said in the heat of anger can never be taken back.
– Silent treatment: This is also called stone walling and it is the act of keeping quiet in a conflict. Although many might think this is a good thing, it is actually more harmful to a relationship because on one hand, it makes the spouse or partner feel unappreciated and on the other, it allows more conflict to brew in the mind as a result of keeping silent.
– Blame shifting: During a conflict, it is extremely unhelpful to shift blames from one to the other. Take responsibility for your roles in the conflict rather than pointing accusing fingers. That does not help the conflict to be resolved, instead it fuels it.
– Escapist mentality: This might be the most unhealthy of all. It is having a nonchalant, unconcerned attitude to the matter causing the conflict. It shows unwillingness to resolve the conflict and can be very damaging to a relationship.
– Physical violence: This does not need too much explanation as most conflicts in relationships when not managed properly degenerate to physical violence. On no account should you attempt to exchange blows in your relationship. This will NEVER help in resolving the conflict but only lead to more problems such as fear of a spouse/partner, unhappiness in the relationship, loss of trust and in serious cases, death.
Author: Aderonke Adeleke
Writer. Music lover. Movie junkie. Social Media Enthusiast. Aspiring dancer. Aspiring photographer. Social Introvert.