3 May 2016
Marriage is not easy, we hear it said all the time. When marriages fail, people begin to question what went wrong. To find out what made the car stop on the outside, you need to check the engine on the inside. Outward impressions are one thing but the true understanding of what happens goes on in secret where no one sees.
The revelations made about the marriage of Nigerian pop artiste, Tiwa Savage to her former manager, Teebillz is one that has many lessons for those willing to learn. Below are a couple of them that we can highlight:
– Never disregard past information about your partner: There are people who are bound to know more about your partner than you. Before getting into a relationship, take time out to find out exactly the type of person they are and never disregard any information you receive. Even if it is a rumor or lie, rumors or lies have a way of being connected with the truth.
– Don’t rush into a relationship because of the idea of getting married: The Nigerian culture has put the onus on individuals of a certain age to get into a relationship and get married. Don’t be in a hurry to get married as getting married is not the biggest hurdle but staying married.
– Know your partner and NEVER marry or get into a relationship with the hope of changing your partner: Behaviors like spending habits and other addictions are hard to hide. Pay attention to these and decide if your partner’s habits are ones you can live with or not. Then never hope that those behaviors or habits will automatically change in marriage. Consider the possibility that if your partner will never change, can you live with it?
– Know when to walk away: At whatever point in your relationship you realize your partner’s habits and behavior are incompatible with yours or are not what you want for your life and future, do not be afraid to walk away. Understand that you owe it to yourself to decide who to be with and be selfish with your choice. Be picky. Marriage is for life – at least it is meant to be – so choose carefully.
– Love is not enough to sustain a marriage: Love is important in a marriage but it is not the only thing that will make it work. Do not be caught up in the romance and forget the fundamental principles that will help your marriage work.
– Money is ALWAYS a BIG issue in marriage: Research has found that the top factor that leads to conflict in a marriage is related to money. Money has and will always be a big issue in a marriage. Realize this and work on making it work for you instead of against you and your relationship.
Author: Aderonke Adeleke
Writer. Music lover. Movie junkie. Social Media Enthusiast. Aspiring dancer. Aspiring photographer. Social Introvert.